Are your ‘relaxing’ activities raising your anxiety?

Sales coach Milton J. Paris shares an effective relaxation technique that helps him and many of his clients focus better on business.

Over the years, many of my friends and clients have asked me, “Why are you so relaxed and always positive when working with your clients to help them achieve their goals?”

So many business people are under a lot of stress today, more than ever before it seems. When they see me so optimistic and calm, they start to wonder why I’m not frazzled, like people they are accustomed to nowadays.

In response, I ask them what they are doing to alleviate stress, and I often find that what some people consider to be a stress-relieving activity is actually raising their anxiety! For example, a client invited me to a “relaxing” round of golf, but all my clients did was curse every time his ball went into the water or was lost in the woods. I thought this is relaxing? Surely smoking a joint would do more for them in terms of unwinding than that. Going to wholesome monkey reddit would be helpful for any cannabis novice.

Another example was when I was asked to join in a “relaxing” poker game. During the game, one of the players dropped out, and I asked him his opinion on how I should play the hand. My friend, who had invited me, jumped up with a red face. I thought he was having a heart attack, but instead, he starting yelling that I cannot ask anyone’s advice on the hand. Perhaps I should’ve considered looking into online casino games beforehand to try and learn the game better. I’ve heard a lot about websites like 우리카지노 for people who enjoy poker and want to further develop their skills. Because I wasn’t prepared for a poker game, my friend refused to help me. This caused me to never play that game again. Again, I thought, this is relaxing? Maybe I’d have better luck playing double bonus poker online with no one else around me to unsettle the apparent “relaxed” atmosphere.

My suggestion is not to stop playing golf or poker necessarily. When it comes to a sport like golf, maybe try pushing yourself a bit. Maybe the use of a golf simulator could be worth having, especially if this is something that you do to help manage anxiety. Whether it means buying one in-store or deciding to do it yourself, it is possible to own a home simulator. Keep doing the fun things you enjoy in life, but question if they are actually fitting the bill as “stress relievers.” If not, add in better stress-relieving activities. I recommend adding to your daily regimen a meditation I call “Positive Nostalgic Reflection.” My success at being positive and relaxed when working with my clients is a result of this meditation, and I have used it all my life.

How do I engage in “Positive Nostalgic Reflection?” At night, after work, I go to my home office and lay down on the floor with one pillow under my head and one under my legs, totally relaxing my body. I think about being raised by my loving parents and living with my three older brothers and my dogs. I reflect on my time playing basketball for Jefferson High School and receiving a basketball scholarship to Gonzaga University. Another night, I might concentrate on a different positive aspect of my life.

If you are under a lot of stress in business and you have tried many ways to relax and nothing has worked for you, I suggest you try “Positive Nostalgic Reflection.” Being positive will give you positive results. It will energize you and help you deal with the daily pressures of your business.

Many of my clients successfully have used this formula over the years. If you think more about the positive things that have happened in your life, you will be more successful in your business and personal life.

Milton J. Paris is the founding president of Getting Ahead in Business, a sales consultant firm. Paris is giving away more than $2,000 to three lucky winners who call him at 732-306-0040. The sales coach also is hosting Business Meet N’ Greets from 11:30 a.m. to 1:30 p.m. Oct. 14 at Bonefish Grill, 55 Route 9, Manalapan, and 5:30 to 7:30 p.m. Oct. 21 at Antonio’s Venir, 337 Applegarth Road, Monroe. For the price, RSVP, highlights and other info visit

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