Are your ‘relaxing’ activities raising your anxiety?

Sales coach Milton J. Paris shares an effective relaxation technique that helps him and many of his clients focus better on business.

Over the years, many of my friends and clients have asked me, “Why are you so relaxed and always positive when working with your clients to help them achieve their goals?”

So many business people are under a lot of stress today, more than ever before it seems. When they see me so optimistic and calm, they start to wonder why I’m not frazzled, like people they are accustomed to nowadays.

In response, I ask them what they are doing to alleviate stress, and I often find that what some people consider to be a stress-relieving activity is actually raising their anxiety! For example, a client invited me to a “relaxing” round of golf, but all my client did was curse every time his ball went into the water or was lost in the woods. I thought, this is relaxing?

Another example was when I was asked to join in a “relaxing” poker game. During the game, one of the players dropped out, and I asked him his opinion on how I should play the hand. My friend, who had invited me, jumped up with a red face. I thought he was having a heart attack, but instead he starting yelling that I cannot ask anyone’s advice on the hand. I never played in that game again. Again, I thought, this is relaxing?

My suggestion is not to stop playing golf or poker necessarily. Keep doing the fun things you enjoy in life, but question if they are actually fitting the bill as “stress relievers.” If not, add in better stress-relieving activities. I recommend adding to your daily regimen a meditation I call “Positive Nostalgic Reflection.” My success at being positive and relaxed when working with my clients is a result of this meditation, and I have used it all my life.

How do I engage in “Positive Nostalgic Reflection?” At night, after work, I go to my home office and lay down on the floor with one pillow under my head and one under my legs, totally relaxing my body. I think about being raised by my loving parents and living with my three older brothers and my dogs. I reflect on my time playing basketball for Jefferson High School and receiving a basketball scholarship to Gonzaga University. Another night, I might concentrate on a different positive aspect of my life.

If you are under a lot of stress in business and you have tried many ways to relax and nothing has worked for you, I suggest you try “Positive Nostalgic Reflection.” Being positive will give you positive results. It will energize you and help you deal with the daily pressures of your business.

Many of my clients successfully have used this formula over the years. If you think more of the positive things that have happened in your life, you will be more successful in your business and personal life.

Milton J. Paris is founding president of Getting Ahead in Business, a sales consultant firm. Paris is giving away more than $2,000 to three lucky winners who call him at 732-306-0040. The sales coach also is hosting Business Meet N’ Greets from 11:30 a.m. to 1:30 p.m. Oct. 14 at Bonefish Grill, 55 Route 9, Manalapan, and 5:30 to 7:30 p.m. Oct. 21 at Antonio’s Venir, 337 Applegarth Road, Monroe. For price, RSVP, highlights and other info, visit www.gettingaheadinbsuiness.com.

See the original article on myCentralJersey.com.